Let’s discuss my day.
Woke up like normal, little cloudy but I prefer rainy weather so its a good morning for me. Feed the kids – muffins and bananas. Get the nearly 1 year old wiped off and change his diaper in preparation for nap. Put him down like normal and I exit to the playroom to do my grocery list and supervise play of the 2 year old.
But … There was a storm brewing upstairs. A horrid, horrid storm. About an hour later my son (napping 1 year old) wakes up and begins screaming. Unlike him as usually he wakes up and talks to himself. I head upstairs to get him and to make sure all limbs were still intact. Based upon the screams I was anticipating an arm or leg had been caught in the crib bars and he had to gnaw the limb off to get himself free.
I turned down the hallway and about 3 feet away from the door I smelled it.
I open the dark room. Time change and all has forced us to blackout the children’s room to still get them to go to bed at 6:30. Our own form of witchcraft. The poop smell was too strong. I turn on the light and there stands my barenaked son. Covered in poop.
Not just any poop. The type of poop that follows your child eating 2 Cutie oranges in the span of 48 hours. The type of poop that stings the nostrils and has semi-digested Cuties in it. The kind that makes it easy for said 1 year old to fingerpaint with it all over his sheets. And stuffed dog. And pillow. And blankets.
Dear Cuties, your oranges should come with a warning label: Great for kids, but heed warning, makes them sh*t.
I go into mom-mode. It’s more lethal than a Navy SEAL in mission mode. I get him in the tub, water going. Johnson & Johnson and all of their chemicals save the day. Contemplate throwing some bleach in the bath water but don’t want to dry his skin out. Or kill him. Spend the whole time trying to keep him from drinking his own bath water. Oh hell … Call it what it is. A large tub of toilet water with some Johnson & Johnson thrown in. I give him a good rinse and dress him. He is freed to spend time with his sister whilst I clean up Poopageddon 2015.
I’m scrubbing away with Vitaloxide and daydreaming about my husband (naked) holding a cold beer just for me and telling me I’m the hottest woman he’s ever seen. To try and avoid the thought of … I’m touching Cutie poop. Then I hear it …
Distinct, echoing splashing. I run into the bathroom to find my 2 and 1 year olds playing in the toilet.
The 1 year old is cleaned and changed, yet again. We all load into the car and head to the grocery store. Because hey … Life doesn’t stop on the account of rain.
Or Cutie Poop. Or toilet water.
So as my AWESOME day ends I wanted to share this super quick, super effective yeast rash cream for your babe’s bottom. I’ve been concocting it over the past week or so. Coconut oil on its own doesn’t work. Honey on its own doesn’t work. Yogurt on its own is marginal at best. But with their powers combined they are …
Seriously though. Next time you have a pesky yeast diaper rash on your hands use this for two days or so and you’ll never go back to anything else!
DIY Yeast Rash Cream:
1.5 tablespoons PLAIN Greek yogurt
1.5 tablespoons melted coconut oil
1/2 teaspoon honey
1. Mix ingredients together. Texture may be grainy, but it will melt in contact with the skin.
2. Store up to 5 days in sealed container in fridge. Mark container! Apply on baby’s bottom in morning and evening. Use barrier cream all other diaper changes. (A&D, Aquaphor.)